July 2004 Worship Services

Ministerial Cognitions

"...then you have your fear, which could be reality, and you have Godzilla, which is reality." -Raymond Burr in Godzilla: King of the Monsters

Well, I am still reading and studying away this summer. The quote above is from my most recent summer reading: Hardcore Zen, Punk Rock, Monster Movies, and the Truth About Reality. This book was written by a Buddhist Priest who had been a punk rocker (founder of Dementia 13). He is presently living in Japan and supporting himself by getting dressed up in big plastic monster costumes for movies like Ultraman.

As I read this book, I am increasingly aware that while I am drawn to Zen meditation, I want more, theologically speaking. Perhaps, this is because if I rely exclusively on my meditation, I am afraid I will just sit and allow myself to be consumed by the many distractions in my life. Perhaps, I want there to be something more than what I am capable of coming up with inside myself. Perhaps, I am unsure if there is such as thing as enlightenment.

Meditation has always been an important part of my life. I have calmed myself with it. I have become more conscious of my inner demons, thus taking away much of their power over me through meditation. I have focused my meditations on various injuries and illnesses to aid in my healing. I have improved my memory, which I direly need at times, through meditation. I have learned that meditation while exercising allows me to be much more in control of my body?s reactions to physical exertion: heart rate, breathing, etc. I am committed to continue my meditation for the rest of my life. Yet, I am still looking for something more.

I guess that is part of what it is to be a Unitarian Universalist. I am never quite satisfied with the answers given to me by someone else or even answers that I

figure out through meditation, contemplation, or personal experience. The truths of life and existence seems quite elusive to me. When I discover a new truth about existence, this new truth creates more questions in my mind/heart/soul. I guess I have become cynical that there are any concrete, hard-and-fast truths out there that I am capable of discovering.

Yet, this is not to say that I don?t believe in anything. I do believe that there is some kind of God/Goddess/divinity that connects us with all creation in some loving creative way. But this personal truth creates more questions than answers. What is that connection? How can something so huge love each of us? I put creative in this description because I certainly image this uniting force must be creative to achieve cosmic connectedness and universal love, more uncertainties within my own certainties.

While I struggle with my own uncertainties, I have to deal with the many unpleasant certainties in our world?the many Godzillas that we must face. War in Iraq, global warming, environmental disasters, tornadoes, social injustice, and poverty are some of the Godzillas that we fear. But fearing them, we still must face them?try to help where we can. Try to help others and our planet, and continue each of our own spiritual searches. It is a lot to try to achieve in one lifetime.

Still, I meditate, I search, I try to help. I guess my meditation also helps me cope with all this work that needs to be done to have a meaningful, purposeful life.

Worship Services:

July 4

Practice Makes Positive: The Importance of Spiritual Practice by Rev. Dale L. Weaver presented by R. Cludius

July 11

Missionaries: God against the Indians by Lyle Gaulding

July 18

Divine Imperfection: The Japanese Aesthetic of Wabi Sabi by Donna Birdwell

"If we are always trying to improve, the ultimate goal must be perfection, right? Not necessarily. The Japanese have developed an entire aesthetic around imperfection, called "wabi sabi." Guaranteed to raise your self-esteem!"

Board Meets @ 9 a.m. Potluck @ 11:45 a.m.

July 25

Is the Executioner Happy? by Jesse Doiron

Jesse will be speaking on behalf of the Texas Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty.